Time Spent Apart
by lala3472
Summary: Jasper and Emmett are Marines and are deployed to Badgdad. Follow the journey of them as they spend time apart. Rated M, for safety measures.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N- I don't own these characters, this is only going to be a 3 or 4 part story nothing long. Just had the inspiration to write a military fan fic. Watched a military movie tonight and had an idea. This is very hard to write. It brings up my past relationships and can be difficult to write in parts. I was married to a marine when I first got out of high school.**

**Chapter 1**

**Bella POV**

It was the day before he went overseas. Jasper, my husband is a sergeant in the marines. This is his second tour over there in the past 2 years. We recently had a baby girl. She is 6 months old. She is her daddy's girl. We were going out to dinner tonight. The night before was always the hardest, I knew I wouldn't see him for 6 months with few phone calls, as many emails as he could. He would be stationed in Baghdad, and he worked security. That is what scared me the most. He would be in the line of fire at all times. I worry sick every day. I have a little girl to take care of now. She will be my first priority. It's going to be hard. We can do it. We have done it in the past. I have the strength. I was pulled out of my thoughts. My mother took Erica for us so we could go to dinner. We went to our favorite place.

"Honey," He said

"Yeah," I said with a tear fall.

"Everything will be okay. It will go faster than you think. You will have Erica to take care of. You have a huge support system. Rose will be by your side whenever needed. She'll need you too with Emmett going too." He said

"I know. I just worry about you. It's not like you are on a ship like last time. This is different you are on the ground and more exposed to the danger over there even more." I said with a tear falling.

"I love you. I will do everything I need to come home to you." He said and I nodded. I knew he would be safe but it still didn't settle my nerves. He would miss his daughters first Christmas, maybe her first birthday. I'd have Rose to help me through it, we would help each other. We would need each other. That is for sure.

"I love you too. I know." I replied. He wiped away the tear that fell down my cheek. We had an amazing dinner. It was a bitter sweet. I knew I would have difficult days when he was gone. When we went to pick up our daughter, my mom was in tears. She worried same as I did. She missed him as much as his own family did. Our last visit was a hard one. They weren't able to come and see him off.

"Son, be safe." She said with tears streaming down her face. He had tears in his eyes. He rarely cried. This was the hardest for him. He wasn't just leaving his wife he was leaving his little girl too. He put her to bed he didn't want to let her go. We both knew the risks of losing him. When he put her to bed a single tear rolled down his cheek. This was his last time putting her to bed for a long time. He knew he'd miss her first steps, first words. It was a choice he made, I am damn proud of him too. He gives his life for everyone else to have freedoms we have. Without him and the others in the military we wouldn't be free. We made a huge sacrifice. Although I miss him when he is gone. I know he loves what he does.

He ran me a bath, and had the candles and all. I love him so much. We had been through so much in the time we have been together. We soaked and showed our love for each other. We made love and the morning came all too soon. It was early and we had to get him off to the base. I smiled a sad smile when we got in the car. I knew in only minutes I would see him walk through that gate and know he may never come back. I knew that was always a possibility. I now had Erica to worry about. It was not just me. It gave me the strength. We pulled into the parking lot. That was when I lost it.

"I love you." I said. When he parked and we got out he embraced me.

"I love you too." He said. I didn't want to let him go. This is always the hardest part. Emmett and Rose pulled in. Her eyes were just as red as mine were. I was taking our baby girl out so he could say goodbye. He took her from my arms. He had tears in his eyes. He didn't want to go. I saw Rose and Em walking over to us. I gave them a week smile. Rose returned the same to me. We were never good at this you would think we would be better at this with 3 other deployments and multiple under ways we wouldn't cry. We did every time.

"Em you keep him safe." I said.

"I will Bells." He said with a sad smile. He never cried but I could see it hurt him to leave Rose.

"Jazz take care of Em. Bring him home safe." Rose said tearing up.

"I will, I always do." Jazz said smiling.

"We'll be fine, we'll be back before you know it." Em said. He reached out to hold Erica. He loved her as much as Jazz. He kissed her on the cheek.

"I'll bring your daddy back. Don't worry baby girl." He said to Erica as he patted Rose's Belly. She was 5 months pregnant. They hadn't found out the sex of the baby. I was hoping for a girl.  
>"I'll be back little one too." He said as he rubbed her belly. "I'll miss all your mom's strange and crazy cravings at 1 in the morning. "We all laughed at that. It was time for them to head in. Rose and I had tears streaming down our faces. They gave us long embraces. Em pulled me into a hug.<p>

"He'll be fine. We both will be, take care of Rose please this is hard on her. I love you sis." He whispered to me.

"I will. I love you too Em. Stay safe and out of trouble." I said. Jazz gave Rose a hug and whispered something to Rose. She nodded. I knew it had to do with what Em told me just switched around. We gave our spouses hugs and kisses one last time before they walked the gate. Rose pulled me into a hug as they walked through the gate. I didn't want to see them go but they had to. It was always hard to say goodbye.

"Rose you want to come to the house, I don't think I can be alone today." I said. She nodded. Next week she would find out the sex of the baby. We wouldn't be able to have contact with them for the next few days probably. We headed to the house Erica was going to get hungry soon. I made some tea for us. After I fed Erica, she went down for her nap. Rose and I just sat there and cried. It was hard on both of us. It was a rough day. The next week passed quickly. Rose asked me to go with her I was really excited. I was happy for her. I know Em would miss the birth but he'd get to be there after. We arrived at the hospital. Rose was glowing with excitement. She really wanted Em to be here. He was like family to me. Jazz and him had known each other since the 2nd grade and joined the military at the same time, in the same boot camp class, and they to lucky to be stationed in the same base let alone unit.

When we were called, they took us to the room. I had Erica with us. Erica is what kept Rose and I upbeat. We didn't want her to see us hurting, she fed off of our emotions. They put the jelly on her stomach, she giggled. It tickled her. I laughed. Erica smiled. They did the usual check and pictures.  
>"So you want to know what you are having?" The technician asked.<p>

"Yes," Rose said with a huge smile. She typed it on the screen.

"It's a boy." She said. I had tears rolling down my eyes so did Rose. Em wanted a boy. He'll be so excited.

"I'm happy for you Rose. Em will be happy too." I said.

"I am happy too. He will be ecstatic." She said. "I'll email him tonight about it. "

"I agree. He'll be happy to hear. He has been excited, Jazz told me he has been antsy to find out. Scan the ultrasound pic too and attach it to the email. Make him wonder until he opens the picture. It will be all worth it in the end to add some suspense. He'll know it was my idea." I said.

She laughed. "I will." We got the pictures and headed home. She had been staying at our house, we both felt more comfortable having each other.

The days quickly flew by, we emailed daily whether we heard a response from our husbands. We missed them dearly. Erica started walking at 8 months old. It was amazing to watch but so sad knowing that her daddy missed it. I sent videos of her walking, of us playing. Rose was 7 months pregnant. She was getting big and she felt fat, I kept telling her that there was a baby inside. I know how she feels I was the same way. I took pictures constantly of her growing belly and sent them to Em she flat out refused to show him her fat Belly as she put it. I told him I would send them. She would only send pictures of her upper half excluding her belly. It made me laugh.

**Jasper POV**

It was 2 months in my deployment. I opened up my email I had a few from my wife. She was constantly sending pictures and it is what kept me going each and every day knowing I had a family back home waiting for me. I missed my daughter dearly. Emmett came walking up as I pulled the picture up, she had also sent a video.

"Hey man, can I see." He asked.

"Sure, not exactly sure what it is?" I said laughing. My wife had never sent anything risqué but you never know.

"I highly doubt that is what it is." He said laughing. I opened it up. It was a video of Erica walking. Em started laughing when Rose said she didn't want to be filmed because she was fat. She just told her she had a child growing and it needed room it was perfectly normal. Em just laughed. "That's my wife. She loves being pregnant but she is starting to become miserable. I feel bad for Bella some days, my wife can be a bitch at times. It has worsened with her pregnancy. She yelled at me one day when I ate the last chocolate bar. She never ate much chocolate before and never craved it. Evidently, she wanted it. I had to drive to the store at 11 o clock at night to get her a chocolate bar." I just laughed when he said that. "Bella got pissed that I didn't get her a pizza with sardines at one point in her pregnancy and she hates sardines." I said smiling.

"Erica is walking now. That is awesome jazz. I had an idea how about you make videos of you reading children books?" He said. "Then Bells can show them to her at night and it will be like you are there with her."

"I would love to do that. I want to surprise Bella with that will you have Rose get some and send them to me. I'll pay you back bro." I said with a tear threatening to fall.

'I know you miss her, I also know you miss putting her to bed. She looks like an angel when she is sleeping Don't worry about the money either." He said with a smile.

"I know, you miss her too." I said.

"I do, very much Jazz, she could always cheer me up. I'm excited for my little boy. I'm still going to get Bella back for that." He said. Em was like family to us. He was Erica godfather, and Rose was her godmother.

"That's my Bella for you. She loves to pick on you. I just can't believe Rose actually let her talk her into it or she found it hilarious." I said.

"She probably found it fucking hilarious knowing Rose. Those two together they can cause trouble, but I love them both." He said

"I know what you mean. Remember when she and Rose went shopping for Halloween and brought back costumes and we thought they were for them, and they were for us." I said. Em started laughing.

"And they withheld sex from us if we didn't put them on and get pictures." He said laughing.

"I still want to know where those pictures are. They are probably hidden in a safety deposit box or something." I said laughing.

"I know man. I want to know too. They need to be burned." He said laughing. I nodded.

"What they make you be?" Lance Corporal Bradley walked in. Shit, the guys will get a laugh out of this.

"They made Em be a cheerleader and me be a school girl." I said. Bradley was about rolling on the floor.

"Wow. I want to see these pictures. I take it they didn't just take 1." He said.

"No, they made us pose." Em said pouting.

"What's so funny?" asked a few guys walking in.

"Oh nothing, except McCarty and Whitlock's wives made them dress up as a cheerleader and school girl and took pictures to prove it and they don't know where the pictures are." Bradley said laughing. They all busted up. We needed the laughter. We all missed our spouses. We needed some humor. It can get gloomy. We didn't care. It kept up moral. I checked the rest of the messages after they all left. We'd be teased about this but it was okay Em and I laughed about their antics. I started to read an email from her.

_My dearest husband._

_I miss you dearly. I hope you enjoyed the video and pictures I have been sending you. Erica misses you dearly. She has been having problems sleeping lately. She is getting in some teeth too. She's been a fussy baby lately. She is doing well walking. She can take 10 steps by herself. She is growing so fast. Rose is getting bigger by the day. She really likes the name Jared. I do too. We have been spending our days outside either in the park, walking, or baby shopping. I have been keeping in contact with the other spouses. It has been helping. I still am having problems sleeping. I love you. I have to go. It is late. I miss you and love you._

_Your loving Wife._

_P.S. Tell that brother of mine hi, I miss his jokes. Rose misses him dearly. She is really struggling right now. She is having Braxton hicks. She is miserable also and just want to have her little boy. _

I hit reply and started typing my reply.

_My dearest wife,_

_I love you and miss you too. I miss you both dearly. I hope she isn't too fussy. I am glad to see the video of her walking. Em cracked up about Rose in the video. We started talking about you and Rose's antics the Halloween prank came up. All the guys found it hilarious they were about to roll on the floor. Em knows it was you who thought of the idea to surprise him of the sex of the baby. I am glad you are talking with the other spouses, they can help you through this. I know it is hard for you. I will be home soon. I am glad you are keeping busy. I wish I could be there to help you sleep. I haven't been sleeping the best either. I need to go and get some sleep, have watch in a few hours. I love you and miss you dearly. I will tell Em hi. He misses you both. Give Erica a big kiss. I am going to have a surprise for you soon. Its really for both of you._

_Your loving husband_

I hit send. I needed to get some sleep. I had a 12-hour watch in a few hours.

**Emmett POV**

I was happy to see Rose in the video. She cracks me up. I miss her dearly, I can hardly wait to get back home to see her and my baby boy. I will get Bella back. The guys found it hilarious our wives made us dress up in women's costumers. Jazz and I were on watch. I saw something suspicious flash in the desert . I motioned to Jazz. He nodded. All of a sudden, the sound of a rocket launcher was heard. Jazz and I dropped to the ground and started crawling for cover.

**A/N- hope you liked. I love reviews and love seeing them in my inbox. Hope you have a good week. I have a few test this week. If you are reading any of my other stories, I may not get an update out as fast this week. **

**Laura**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N- I don't own these characters. I hope you enjoyed the first chapter. I got a lot of feedback and hits. Thank you all for the feedback. I appreciate it. Here is the second part. I don't plan on making this more than a 4 part story, so the months and time will be going by fast, and I may elaborate on it later, I just don't have enough time to add all the detail I would like to. Please don't hate me for this Chapter.**

**Previously on Time Spent Apart**

**Emmett POV**

I was happy to see Rose in the video. She cracks me up. I miss her dearly, I can hardly wait to get back home to see her and my baby boy. I will get Bella back. The guys found it hilarious our wives made us dress up in women's costumers. Jazz and I were on watch. I saw something suspicious flash in the desert . I motioned to Jazz. He nodded. All of a sudden, the sound of a rocket launcher was heard. Jazz and I dropped to the ground and started crawling for cover.

**Chapter 2**

**Jasper POV**

We were on watch. I saw something out of the corner of my eye in the distance, it looked like a flash of light coming off metal. Emmett noticed it too. I heard the rocket launcher go off. We were under attack. This wasn't our first attack. We have had 2 others since we have been here. We crawled to safety. The alarms were alerted and everyone was on guard. The explosion went off 20 feet or so in front of us, where we were when it was launched. We could never tell Bella or Rose about these incidents. That was a close call. We did a sweep to make sure nothing was set, and no one was around, and that it wasn't a diversion to something else. We finished our watch. We went to our makeshift barracks of thin metal frame beds. Em and I had a narrow escape. We could have lost our lives. That was the closest call we have had in a long time. The last time we were on the carrier and we had a sub within a quarter mile of the carrier. That was scary. We really couldn't have done much at that time. We had the rest of the ships around us but there are 5,000 people on those carriers, it would have been a mad dash to get off and get to safety. How they got that close, we don't know to this day. We never told them about our narrow escapes they worried enough about us they didn't need to worry anymore.

"Jazz you alright?" Em asked.

"Yeah, that just scared the shit out of me." I said.

"I know man. I told Bells I'd bring you home safe and I intend to do that." He said.

"I know I told Rose the same thing about you." I said smiling.

"Those girls worry about us both." He said. One of the officers came into the tent.

"You okay?" he asked us.

"Yeah we are fine. It just scared us considering it landed where we were standing. With all due respect we need to expand our perimeter; if they got that close they just need a few more feet to hit the security check point." I said. Em nodded.

"Yeah, I planned on it, I just wanted to see how you guys were doing." He said and left.

We talked for a while longer about the girls. We missed them. We fell asleep shortly after that. It was going to be another long day. We were counting the days down until we left and got so see our wives and kids. Bella was going to video tape the birth for Em. Births aren't pretty but I knew Em wanted to see his baby boy being born. They were going to name him Jared, as Bella had told me. Maybe when I got back we could try for another little one. I would love that. I also know Bella would love that also. We wanted to have a few more. If I had all girls, I would be happy. I'd have to beat the boys off of them. I slept soundly, I had dreams of Bella and Erica having them in my arms and never letting them go. Morning came all too soon. I got up Em and I checked our Emails, we each had one from our spouses. Bella emailed him pictures of Rose she snuck of her Belly. It made me laugh that Rose didn't want him to see her fat as she put it. He didn't care he loved her belly. I loved Bella's when she was pregnant. I woke up more than once with my head on her belly being kicked by Erica. We both found it funny. I opened up my email from Bella.

_My dearest husband,_

_I was happy to see got back so quickly. I love waking up to having an email from you. It brightens my day. I love you and miss you. I wish you could get some sleep. You need to be alert for watch. I kind of figured Em would laugh. She chewed me out for that one. I still love her though. I can't believe you told them that. I'll have to get those pictures out and email them. That was hilarious. I am glad it helped with adding some humor. I know it can get hard over there being away from loved ones. I am still having my hard and difficult days. I talk those days to the other spouses and Rose. It has helped. I would love to be in your arms right now. I miss your warm embrace. We miss him too. I am looking forward to our surprise. I love you baby and miss you dearly. Erica is waking up. Stay safe. _

_Your loving Wife_

I hit reply and started my message.

_My dearest wife,_

_I miss your warm embrace and Erica's sweet slobber kisses. I am glad it is helping. I know it is very difficult for you when I am gone. I'll be calling soon. We will have the phones back up and running again. They have been down for security reasons. I love you honey, sorry for making this so short, others are waiting, and I need to get something to eat. I love you and miss you both. Tell Rose I am keeping her hubby in line and he is staying out of trouble. I am counting the days till we are home. This has been the hardest tour so far. By the way where are those pictures._

_Your loving Husband_

I hit send so the next person could use the computers. I had my laptop, but I couldn't hook up to internet for reason of security. We headed off to eat. It was hot as hell today. I was cooking in my uniform. Some guys were making a video on their off time. They cracked me up. They were making a video to N'Sync I think it was This I Promise you. It's sad I know it but, they had been practicing it. It fit how we felt we missed our loved ones and they are what kept us going. Em was laughing along with me. He found it hilarious. He actually went and jumped in the shot and started dancing with them. I was about to fall on the ground laughing. They wanted me to join in I told them hell no. I'll send the video to Bella Rose will laugh her ass off over this one. Em was known for his crazy antics but this was above all of them. He finished dancing and actually asked a serious question about making a video. I told him no. I knew I would probably get sucked into it. We made it to chow. It was the usual.

"Jazz please do a video with me and some of the other guys so we can send to the girls they will love it." He said smiling.

"No," I said with the look of there is no way in hell.  
>"Please, it would be fun." He said. I knew he was right, and the girls would laugh their ass off.<p>

"Fine, but no N'Sync." I said.

"Okay, that's fine." He said. As I said, I'd probably get sucked into it. I shook my head what did I get myself into. We had watch in a few minutes. Hopefully it went by uneventful.

As our watch went on it was uneventful. The days passed by quickly I only had a few months left. We were still counting down the days. We emailed daily when we finished the video and thank god it was finished we sent it to the girls. The emails may be about small things and simple things that she does during the day that she tells me but they keep me going, knowing she is doing well. It was my daughter's birthday soon and Rose had Jared at 36 weeks. Jared was ready to meet the world. He was a healthy 8 lbs. 8 oz. He had Emmett's hair and Roses eyes and nose. He was a beautiful baby boy. One day I hoped to have one of my own little boys. I could play football with him, teach him to play baseball. Rose sent me the books and I did the videos. Bella played one each night for her. She cooed and said daddy. It melted my heart. She sent me videos of her talking. She would point to pictures of me and call me daddy. It melted my heart; it killed me not to be able to be there now with her right now while her first milestones happened.

"Hey you okay?" Em asked. We were in the barracks, I must have gone quiet.

"Yeah, just thinking about what I am missing right now. I know Bella understands and Erica really doesn't understand why but she knows who I am." I said with a tear falling.

"I know what you mean, I wanted so badly to be with Rose when she had Jared. I really do appreciate Bella taping it for me. It meant a lot to me. I may not have been there but I saw him being placed on her chest and looking down at him." He said as a few tears started to fall.

"I know man. I understand what you mean." I said. I couldn't imagine missing Erica's birth, I did know what it was like missing milestones. I handed him a letter.

"In case anything ever happens to me, give this to Bella." I said. He nodded. I handed him 4 letters.

"I told her I'd bring you home safe and I will do everything I have to do that." He said.  
>"I know, I just have a bad feeling." I said. We headed off to watch for another shift. It didn't feel right.<p>

**Rosalie POV**

These past 4 months have flown by fast soon they would be home soon. Em would get to meet Jared. It killed him not be able to be there for his birth but he couldn't and I understood. Bella did tape it. I looked horrible but it made Em happy. He got to see his first moments in the world. Bella has been helping me out a lot. We were doing birthday shopping for Erica. I had been staying over there for most of the time they have been gone. I felt comfortable knowing if I needed to go to the hospital, I'd have someone to take me. Jared was a few weeks old. He was growing so fast. I knew Em as well as Jazz wanted to be there for the first moments. He was missing his little girls milestones. He knew how Em felt. We kept in contact daily. We were picture happy, we had probably at least 100 pictures of Jared and Erica in the last 2 weeks. They got lots of pictures. We sent them a package. We made homemade candy, and sent some hard candy, pictures and little things they would need. We headed home.

"Rose," Bella said.

"Yeah," I asked, she seemed upset.

"Something doesn't feel right at all." She said breaking down in tears.

"Everything is okay, Em will keep him safe." I said.

"It just doesn't feel right. Something feels all wrong." She said.

When we got home. I was crushed, it wasn't okay. Something was wrong majorly wrong. We pulled in the driveway. There were 2 marines in dress blues at the front door. A short man with bronze hair and a tall man with blond hair. They approached us as we made our way to the door.

"Are you Mrs. Whitlock, " he asked.

"Yeah, " she said with tears streaming down her face, I had them flowing as well. She put Erica down. I knew this wasn't good.

"We regret to have to tell you this. Sargent Whitlock has been killed in combat." The other one said.

"No, No, it can't be happening." She said we both had tears streaming down our faces. "No," was all we could say.

"How, "I asked. I knew Bella couldn't ask Everything was a blur.

"They were at the security check point and a truck that had been high jacked by the terrorists was pulling into the checkpoint, it all looked legit. Sargent McCarty took out the one that shot Sargent Whitlock. We give you our deepest apologies. Someone will contact you in a few days." The tall one said.

"Is Emmett okay?" I asked with tears still streaming.

"Are you his wife?" The short one asked

"Yes, I am" I said

"Yes, he is okay. He is coming home in a few days. They are getting him home as quickly as possible. He should be contacting you soon in the next day or so." The tall one said.

"When did this happen?" Bella asked.

"It happened this 10 A.M. ma'am, we were notified less than an hour ago. We got here as soon as we could to let you know." The short one said. They said their names, we didn't even pay attention. Erica looked at Bella and gave her a hug.

"mommy love oo" She said. It brought me to my knees.

"Come here baby, let's gets you inside." I had tears streaming down my face. I grabbed Jared's car seat and brought both in the house. It broke my heart, Jazz wouldn't be coming back. I still couldn't believe it. We just got an email this morning. He was going to call tonight. This couldn't be happening. I called Bella's mom.

"Hello, Rose," She said.

"HI," I said with tears streaming down my face.  
>"Come to Bella's, we need you." I said.<p>

"No, not Jazz." She said crying.  
>"Yeah, he's gone. They are talking to Bella right now. They are outside. I got Erica and Jared in the house. I couldn't be out there anymore." I said.<p>

"Em is okay?" she asked.

"Yeah, he'll be home in a few days. He killed the guy that got Jazz. We don't know details. I have a feeling we will only hear them from Em." I said.

"Rose, I will be there in a few." She said. Bella came in the house. She could barely walk. I pulled her into me.  
>"I'm so sorry. I still can't believe it. It's not real. Your mom will be here soon I called her. She is on her way." I told her. She smiled a sad smile. She picked up Erica and hugged her tight.<p>

"Daddy," she said pointing to a picture on the mantle.

"Yes, that is your daddy." She said. "We'll miss your daddy, he loved you very much."

We both broke down. Erica just hugged us. She didn't understand but she knew something was wrong.

"Daddy read story." She said looking at the corner. Maybe he was there, I don't know.

Hey Jazz I whispered.

"Daddy," Erica said.

"You want to hear a story from him?" I asked. She nodded. I put on a story for her. I just cried. It just couldn't be true. I wonder how Em was holding up. They had known each other since grade school. This was not the homecoming I was planning. It was going to be a happy one where they walked through the gates and gave us hugs and we went home with our kids and spent time with our husbands.

This can't be happening.

**A/N- Sorry for no warning on this. If this hit close to home I'm sorry. It's just that you don't get a warning when it happens. They just show up. I have never had this happen but I do know what it's like to have it in the back of your mind when they are gone overseas. Please review if you would like. This was really hard to write. My screen is becoming a blur so I will get off. This wasn't an upbeat chapter. In a way I am letting out my feelings and fears I had. I give all my respect to those who are spouses of those serving in the military. God Bless.**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N- I don't own these character. I know you all probably hate me for killing Jasper. As I stated. Something triggered my fears of losing a loved one overseas. I have suppressed them for so long it just hit really hard. This is a way I can work through it. God bless all the families with loved ones in the armed forces.**

**Previously in Time Spent Apart**

**Rosalie POV**

"Yes, that is your daddy." She said. "We'll miss your daddy, he loved you very much."

We both broke down. Erica just hugged us. She didn't understand but she knew something was wrong.

"Daddy read story." She said looking at the corner. Maybe he was there, I don't know.

Hey Jazz I whispered.

"Daddy," Erica said.

"You want to hear a story from him?" I asked. She nodded. I put on a story for her. I just cried. It just couldn't be true. I wonder how Em was holding up. They had known each other since grade school. This was not the homecoming I was planning. It was going to be a happy one where they walked through the gates and gave us hugs and we went home with our kids and spent time with our husbands.

This can't be happening.

**Chapter 3**

**Emmett POV**

We started off our shift normally. Jazz was antsy. He didn't have a good feeling. I didn't like that. We all have learned being deployed to trust our instincts. We were expecting a few supply trucks to come in today. We would have to do a thorough search. I broke my heart when he handed me that letter I hope to god I didn't have to ever give her that letter.I didn't want to think about that. I needed to keep our moral up.

"You okay Em?" He asked.

"Yeah, for the most part. You giving me that letter made me think." I said.

"I just have a feeling. It's not a good one. I don't like it." He said.

"It's just nerves." I told him. Hoping it was . I don't think Bella would handle it well if anything happened. I know she wouldn't, Rose would be as bad as her. He is like her brother as I am Bella's.

"I hope so. I am just worried too." He said.

"I know man. I am worried too. I agree something does feel off. We just need to be extra alert." I said he nodded and we headed off to watch.

"What is the second thing you are going to do after seeing Rose and Jared. Well I know what is going to happen when Jared is asleep. What do you miss the most?" He asked.

"Well I miss just being able to hold her. Not being able to hold my son." I said.

"Same here. I miss just the warmth from her and Erica." He said with a tear in his eye. The first truck of the caravan came in. We did our search and it came up clean. We switched off from who talked to them and who was on guard. It was the 3rd one that came through. Jazz approached it. It looked legit. The driver had a legit id. As he was searching for anything that could be an explosive, a few guys out the jumped out the back. He got Jazz in the Back. He fired 3 shots quickly. I took him out along with the second guy, but it was too late. The caviler had taken too much damage. He was hit in the stomach. I ran to him as soon as I knew I was covered.

"Jazz don't go, Stay with us. They can get you healed up." I said.

"Tell them I love them. I will always love them and be with them by their side even if they can't see me. I love you brother. I'll watch over everyone while you are away. Take care of Bella and Erica." He said as he went limp. The medics had made it to him by now. They hauled him off to the makeshift hospital. They pulled him into surgery. I held his hand all the way as far as I could go.  
>"Don't go, stay with us. Bella and Erica need you. I told her I'd bring you back safe. I can't break the promise. You will be okay. You will heal. Please for all of us. I can't lose you. You are my brother. I love you Man. Please don't go into the darkness. We need you. You need to meet Jared. You're his godfather." I said. As they rolled him in. I fell to my knees. I felt hands on my shoulders. I just cried. I was scared. I knew it was a possibility he was gone.<p>

"If you need to go home after this you are free to go." The major said. I nodded.

"Please, if he doesn't make it I can't stay if he is gone. I can't do it. I would have broken the promise I made to my sister and niece. I need to go home and help them through this if he does. She will need all the help she can get. She is a nervous wreck when we are gone. This is possibly going to send her over the edge. I don't want that, I need to be there for my family." Shortly after he rolled them in. The doctor came out. He had tears in his eyes.

"I'm sorry, he didn't make it McCarty. I'm so sorry. We got the bullet out but he had lost too much blood by then. If you want to see him you can. We have him covered up so you won't be able to see the damage.

"Can I take his dog tags?" I asked. He nodded. I took his Helmet and his dog tag from around his neck. The second was missing. It was on his toe for identification.

"Why Jazz, Why you? Why was it you that had to go? I made a promise to Bells. You kept your promise to Rose, I broke mine to Bells. I'll miss you brother." I said. I felt a hand on my shoulder.

"Son are you okay." The major said.

"No, I need to leave now or as soon as you can get me out of here, I need to be there for Bella." I said. "I didn't want this to be the first time I met my son. I wanted it to be happy. He wanted to try for another baby, when he got back."

"Okay, I respect that. I'm sorry. We never know why we lose good men. He took the ultimate price. Give our condolence to his wife. I can only imagine how hard it will be for her. I know his daughter is turning 1 soon." He said. I nodded.

"She would be 1 today our time, tomorrow for them. That is what kills me the most. Jazz had a bad feeling before going on watch. It could have been me." I said.

"It could have been you. It was his time to go. We have to remember that. He will be honored. He was a good man. He loved his family and would do anything for them. He made the ultimate sacrifice. God bless his family and those around them. His daughter will know what a good man he was. I'm sure you will have a big part in that." He said.

"Yes she will. She will know he paid the ultimate sacrifice for her freedom and loved her dearly, the last thing he said was to take care of Bella and Erica. I will till the day I die. I will always be there for them." I said with tears flowing down my cheek.

"I'll get the process going to process you out, take your time. Go to counseling if you need it. They are welcome to too. Bella will need someone to talk to. Let her yell and scream don't stop her let her get her emotions out. It will be best for her. It is just something I have learned through the years." He said.

"I will. She can hit, punch, kick, yell, and scream whatever she needs. I'll be her punching bag if needed. I can take it. I broke my promise." I said crying

"Don't blame yourself. It isn't your fault. We don't understand how this happened. You took them out so they didn't get hurt anyone else. You are a hero too. You took the chance of your own life being taken. A stray could have very well got you too. You need to take care of them. Take your time. I don't think she'll blame you, she knew the risks, she has been through this before. She knows. She won't blame you. "He said. I still broke my promise. I feel horrible.

"Son don't feel bad. I know you did all you could to save him. He was hit too many times for the Kevlar to keep him safe. It can only take so much." He said.

"Let's go son. Let's get you ready to go see your wife, son, sister, and niece." He said. It was going to be a long few days. I just wanted to be home. They started the processing out. I went to my bunk and just cried. No one bothered me or said a word. They all knew it could have happened to them. I had known Jazz since grade school. It was hard to believe he was gone. My wife was devastated, he was like a brother. I couldn't imagine how Bells was feeling I let her down. I know I was told it wasn't my fault and I did all I could. It wasn't enough. I lost my best friend, and now I had to deliver this letter. I didn't want to have to fulfill this. I don't understand how this happened. They shouldn't have been in their anyway. They should have never been a threat. I just laid there for hours. I didn't eat or sleep. I was awoken out of my state of shock.

"Son, we have a chopper flying you out in 30 minutes. We will get Whitlock's belongings shipped out to his family, so you don't have to." The major said.

"No its fine. I can do it. He'd rather me be doing it. I have a feeling he knew this was going to happen. He handed me a letter. I have a feeling he wrote a few more. He wouldn't just write one he'd leave a message for all his family." I told him. He nodded.

"Okay son. If you would like to." He said and walked out of the tent. I had most of my stuff packed up anyway. We never really unpacked. I was gathering Jazz's stuff. I was right. He had 3 other letters. One for me, Rose and Erica. It broke my heart. I picked the one up that was for me and opened.

_**Em,**_

_**If you are reading this, I am gone. I will watch over you for all your life. I had a feeling something wasn't right. I knew it was probably life threatening, or I could be killed. Don't fault yourself on my death. You did all you could, I'm sure. You have been my best friend for years and most of all my brother. We have had many fun times. Please remember those times. Don't cry over my death. You have a baby boy to go home too. You have more to live for. I will always be watching over you. I will be your guardian angel. When you are having a tough time, look in the sky, I will be watching and making sure everything is going the way it is planned. It was my time to go. Please take care of Bella and Erica. They will need you now. Give Jared a kiss, I will watch over him and Rose when you are away. They will be safe. You got me home safe; you didn't break your promise. It wasn't the home you were thinking. I am home up in the heavens. Keep my girl safe and watch over them. I have enclosed a letter to Rose and Erica also. You probably figured out that I just didn't write Bella a letter. You know me better than that. **_

_**Your Brother,**_

_**Jazz**_

I was in tears by the time I finished reading it. He did know. He knew something was wrong. I brought him home to a different home. I walked outside and looked in the sky. A small ray of light showed through at that time. It was Jazz showing me he was still with us. Just not walking on earth. I finished packing up his belongings. The major came in.  
>"you ready son?" He asked.<p>

"Yeah." I said, I would be as strong as I could be for Bella. I boarded the chopper. It was a short trip to the airport. I was boarded on the plane for a long 16 hour flight home. I looked forward to see my wife and son, but this was not the way I wanted it to be under these circumstances. The minutes passed slowly. I remembered our good days.

Flashback.

It was senior year. We were all out with friends in the hills mudding. Jazz buried his truck, he was so mad that a Ford pulled him out and it was a smaller truck. He blew up the clutch that night which only made it worse. Looking back now it wasn't so bad it was funny. Yeah we had to put a new clutch in, it was pain in the ass, but we did it, only to go back out the next weekend and break something else. Those were good times.

End of Flash back.

I'd miss him but I know he will always be watching and keeping tabs on us. The flight finally ended, and I was landing at the airport. I wasn't sure how I was getting home. I'd call a taxi. Neither of them were probably in the shape to drive. As I got out of the gate. Rose, Erica, Bella, Jared and Bell's mom was waiting with tears in their eyes. I started to tear up. I didn't care if they saw me cry. It was a hard time right now. Rose ran up to me. She threw herself into me. I pulled her into me and just held her. Bella was sobbing by now. I gave Rose a kiss and she nodded to go to Bella. She needed the comfort of her brother. I picked her up and hugged her.

"I'm so sorry. I tried so hard to stop them. I got them but it was too late." I told.

"It's okay Em, it's not your fault. We all know the risks you two took over seas. We knew you may never come back. I knew something was wrong. I knew it." She said.

"I know sis. I am here. " I said smiling weak smile. I picked up the car seat Jared was in. I unbuckled him and took him out. I just hugged him. It was an amazing moment but a sad one at the same time Jazz should have been here to hold him too. This was his godson. Erica caught my attention. She was pointing by Bella.

"Daddy." She said.

"Daddy isn't with me sweetie." I told her with tears falling from my eyes. She just kept pointing by Bells. Maybe she was telling me he was here. I smiled. I felt a hand on my shoulder he was here, as he promised. I held him all the way to the baggage and I put him back in his car seat. I just smiled. I had my little boy and my family. I knew we could make it through anything. I'd take care of Bella and Erica. They were my family too. We headed off to Bella's, the kids needed a nap. I know Bella needed some time to grieve. We all did.

**A/N- Hope you enjoyed. Sorry it's been taking so long on updates. I have been swamped with school. Hope you have had a safe weekend and have wonderful day off if you have Monday off. Please review if you have time. I love the feedback. This was a difficult chapter to write. Sorry it there are a few errors. **


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N- I don't own these characters. I am sorry for not updating sooner. Had some writers block with this story and swamped with school. I know what I want to write it just hasn't been coming to me. I hope you enjoy this chapter, I can't guarantee you won't be in tears by the end of it. This is a tragic story. Have a safe weekend. God bless the men and women who are or have served our county not just this weekend but every day. A song is included in some of the chapter. I don't own it. It fits the chapter well.**

**Bella POV**

The past 2days have been hell My mom took Erica. I couldn't take care of her right now. All I wanted to do was sleep. I really haven't eaten. I wanted to sleep but I couldn't for the life of me. I kept seeing Jazz and waking up crying. Rose has been a wreck as well. She was happy to see Em but she didn't want it to be this way. She wanted a happy experience not picking him up from the airport after Jazz passed. I had been contacted. Jazz's body would be here tomorrow and his service would be the a day or so later. They were working out the details. I couldn't do it. The love of my life and father of my child was killed I could barely function. Mom wasn't handling it well. Jazz's and Em's Parents were coming soon for the service. Em's parents were just as bad as us. They had known Jazz along time. Jared was doing good through all this. He wasn't sleeping but with how we were I understood why. He was only a few weeks. Our stress level was affecting him. My mom took Jared the first day. We needed time. I was brought out of my thoughts when my mom asked if I was ready to go get Em. I immediately broke down. Rose was driving. I was in no shape to drive. I couldn't go 5 minutes without crying. It was bitter sweet to see Em. I was happy he was home safe, but I wished Jazz had made it back with him. I knew I'd never see Jazz again only in a coffin. I knew the risks of being married to military, I just never had anyone close that it happened to. Jazz had one of the most dangerous jobs being security. He was the first person to be exposed to them. We made it to the airport. Erica was with my mom who was following us, we had Jared with us. We knew we wouldn't have enough room for the kids and Em. We got there about the time he came out. He ran to Rose in tears. I couldn't imagine him watching it all. He was my brother. As much as I was hurting, he was hurting the same. I was in tears when I saw him. He was in shambles.

He came to me. Hugging me. If he held me any longer I would have soaked his shirt. It wasn't his fault that Jazz was killed, it was the ones that attacked the security check point. He needed to know that. He picked up Jared. He had so much love and hurt in his eyes as he did this. He wanted Jazz to be there. We all did. Erica kept saying daddy. I saw Em smile and I felt a hand on my shoulder. I broke down in tears. He was with us in spirit. He was letting us know he was okay. I didn't say anything. I think Jazz let him know that he was there with us. I may be crazy but it was a comfort knowing he was safe. We made our way to my house. I didn't expect them to stay. They needed their time alone. They needed time to grieve by themselves. We needed to get Jared's stuff from my house too.

Em grabbed his backpack from the back. He had tears in his eyes. I didn't like the look of this. He started sobbing when we headed in. Rose hugged him as did I. We all needed a hug. Mom came in with us.

"I have something from Jazz." He said with tears flowing. "I never wanted to have to give these to you."

He pulled out his dog tags and handed them to me along with his cover. I broke down. I leaned into Rose. She leaned on me. We both cried. She knew it could be Em that didn't come home. He pulled out 3 letters. I didn't have to know what they were I already knew. They were letters to Erica, Rose and myself. It broke all our hearts. I could see in Em's eyes he didn't want to give them to us. It was hard for him to even give them to us. He set them on the table. I was right. I picked up mine and opened it.

_**My love, **_

_**If you are reading this I am gone. Don't worry, I am with you always. I have loved you from the day I met you. I fell in love with you more every day. You made me happy and I love you for that. You were my guardian angel. I will be yours now. **_

_**In my last days, I saw my life was coming to an end. I knew something was wrong. I just didn't know when it happened. I had a feeling I wouldn't be coming home. Every thought I had was of you and Erica. I will still get to watch her grow, but it will be from a distance. I cherished every email and had wonderful dreams of you every night of your beautiful face. I thought of the first days Erica was born and ran through all the videos and pictures you sent me. You two were always in my thoughts. The best days of my life was the day I married you and the day Erica was born. You have so much ahead of you stay strong. Erica needs you. I love you and always will. I will watch over you and Erica. Stay safe and remember, I am already there, I am the sunshine in your hair, I'm the shadow on the ground, I'm the whisper in the wind, you'll know I am always there. I wanted to say I love you one last time. **_

_**Your husband**_

_**Jazz**_

I read it out loud, everyone was in tears. He knew that was my favorite song. I knew he was here. I knew he always would be. That was the song that got me through the deployments. I could barely finish the last sentence. My mom came and gave me a hug. Erica came over and crawled in my lap.

"Daddy wuv oo." She said. I started to cry harder. I hugged her.

"I know." I told her "I love him too."

"Daddy no." She said smiling. She saw him. As strange as it may sound I was happy she did. It gave me comfort.

"Yes he does. His last words to me was tell Erica and Bella I love them and watch over them. I will to the day I die." He said through his tears.

"Daddy still here." Erica said smiling. I nodded

"Thank you." I told him walking over hugging him.

"I couldn't save him. We were alternating truck inspections, 2 guys jumped out the back and got him in the back. I took the two out but I was too late. I followed him as far as I could go. His Kevlar took too much damage. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry Bella." He said.

"You did what you could. I know you did. You took out the men that took Jazz. You saved multiple people from being lost if they had gotten in. I don't like it that Jazz had to be taken from me and Erica but we all knew the risk. I just hoped I'd never have to know the pain of it. We all know the sacrifices that are made. He will be honored. I'm glad you made it home safe. It could have been you too." I said.  
>"I know. It kills me to know he's gone. I wanted a happy reunion. Him to meet Jared, and lots of hugs and kisses to the kids. Not a sad one like this." He said.<p>

"I know, I wanted a happy one. I knew something was wrong. I just hoped it wasn't true. "I said through tears. I picked up the letter for Erica. I was about to open it. My mom knew it would be even harder to read.

"May I," she said crying. I nodded and handed it to her.

_**My Sweet little angel,**_

_**I love you sweetie. I will always love you. You had me wrapped around your finger the first few second you were born. You came out screaming, you were mad. You reached for me when you came out before they placed you on your mom's chest. I was crying as hard as she was. You were so beautiful and will always be. Don't ever let anyone tell you different. I will watch you grow. I may not be there physically but I will always be watching over you. I will also make sure the boys treat you right. I wish I could be there on your first date holding the shotgun when the doors opened. I'd love to see their face. I'm sure Uncle Emmett will do that for me though. He's probably sitting there laughing if this is being read out loud. I can see it. I will be by your side as you walk down the aisle. I hope Em can take my place for me on that honor. He loves you like his own. You have him wrapped around your little finger. You know it's true Brother. I love you sweetie. For the time I was on earth I loved to watch you grow and I will watch over you always.. I cherished each and every moment I had with you including the videos your mommy sent me even when I was up all night with you when you had ear infections and colic. I loved watching the videos and watched them often. Don't give mommy too much trouble growing up. I'll miss holding you that is what I missed most while I was gone. Rocking you to sleep, feeding you. You are forever in my heart. I'm your imaginary friend, I'm always there. **_

_**Love you always,**_

_**Daddy**_

We laughed through our tears as she read this. I knew Em would be at the front door on her first date with the shotgun. It was true Em loved Erica like his own and she had him wrapped around his finger. He'd race to her every time she'd cry when he was around. I think she thought it was a game. It was cute to watch. Jared would do the same thing. Rose picked up her letter. She was balling. She opened it up.

_**My sweet sister,**_

_**I know you must be going through hell right now. Em will be devastated and Bella will be in shambles and with you having Jared not too long ago it has to be hard. I saw all those pictures. He is adorable. I wish I had gotten to meet him and hold him. I will always watch over both of you. I am probably standing in the room with you. You just can't see me. I kept my promise to you to bring Em home safe and he kept his. I am home safe, looking out for all of you. Take care of Em. He needs you right now and always will. You are his rock. He loves you very much. I love you sis. Give Jared a hug and a kiss for me. I love you sis. Stay safe and never forget I am watching over keeping you safe. I will look out for Em and keep him out of as much trouble as I can. I will see you all again. **_

_**Your stubborn Brother**_

_**Jazz**_

She finished reading it. Em was holding her. She was balling even harder.

"Why did he have to go. Why did he have to take my brother?" She said.

"I know. I miss him too sis. He'll always be with us, we have to remember that." I said. Em nodded. It was true we would all see him again at some point. We laughed because Em did get into trouble and Jazz got him out of it a lot of the time, especially in school. They were always in trouble for something. Either they were breaking things on their trucks or in the principal's office for pranks. Em pulled out his letter. He was crying. He wanted to read his though. It was important for him. He started reading. Jared had fallen asleep in his car seat and Erica was sitting with my mom about asleep. Erica looked like she was holding someone's hand. I didn't have to second guess. He would always be with us.

_**Em,**_

_**If you are reading this, I am gone. I will watch over you for all your life. I had a feeling something wasn't right. I knew it was probably life threatening, or I could be killed. Don't fault yourself on my death. You did all you could, I'm sure. You have been my best friend for years and most of all my brother. We have had many fun times. Please remember those times. Don't cry over my death. You have a baby boy to go home too. You have more to live for. I will always be watching over you. I will be your guardian angel. When you are having a tough time, look in the sky, I will be watching and making sure everything is going the way it is planned. It was my time to go. Please take care of Bella and Erica. They will need you now. Give Jared a kiss, I will watch over him and Rose when you are away. They will be safe. You got me home safe; you didn't break your promise. It wasn't the home you were thinking. I am home up in the heavens. Keep my girl safe and watch over them. I have enclosed a letter to Rose and Erica also. You probably figured out that I just didn't write Bella a letter. You know me better than that. **_

_**Your Brother,**_

_**Jazz**_

Mom went and put Erica in her crib when he finished reading the letter. We all got up and hugged him. It was hard on all of us. I can't imagine the hurt he was going through him watching it. He did all he could, he did get Jazz home safe. Jazz knew something was wrong. He wrote his last statements and we would have them forever. They were his last words to us. This meant a lot to me. It was kind of a closure in a way.

"Bella will you be okay for a few hours so I can go home for a little while." Em asked crying.  
>"Yeah, I will. Mom will be here. " I said. They got Jared's car seat and headed out after giving me a hug. I went and laid down in my empty bed. I cried myself to sleep. My mom didn't bug me. She let me cry. As I fell asleep. I felt a kiss on my forehead. It made me cry harder.<br>"I love you Jazz," I said. I heard a faint whisper I love you too baby girl. I'll never be far.

**A/N- sorry this one was a real tear jerker. It has been the hardest to write out of the 4 chapters now. Please Review if you have time. This story is very emotional to write. I am in tears the whole time writing it. So there may be a few mistakes. Have a wonderful weekend and god bless. **


	5. Author note

**A/N**

**I am working on an update for this story. Please bear with me. I will try to have it out by the Monday. Sorry, for the long wait on updates. This story is emotional for you as readers as it is me to write. I will have an update out by Tuesday definitely. I am about a third of the way through this next update, and I plan on working on it more tonight. The next chapter is the parents coming and will possibly include the funeral. This will be a very emotional chapter. Have an awesome weekend. **

**Laura**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N- I don't own these characters. This will be another tear filled chapter. There will only be a few more of these and the healing process will truly begin.**

**Emmett POV**

Rose drove home. I was in no shape to drive. I had his letters replaying in my head. It brought some closure. The funeral would bring even more. I would be one carrying the casket. That hit me hard. I never wanted to have to be in this situation. We all knew the risks of us being in the service. I just never thought he would be the one taken away. He was nothing but a good man, husband and father. He was so caring. He didn't deserve to go out the way he did. We made it home. Rose looked at me with sad eyes.

"I know you are hurting. I'll give you your space if you want." She said with tears in her eyes. I shook my head.

"No, all I want to do is hold you and cuddle with Jared." I said through my tears. " I want to hold my family." I said with a half-smile. It was something Jazz could never do again. He went out thinking about Bella and Erica. "I love you."  
>"I love you too baby." She said through her tears. We went into the house, I took Jared out of his car seat and we laid in bed. I cradled Jared in one arm and held Rose with the other. I held my family. We all fell asleep. Rose and I were emotionally drained. We had been through hell the past few days. I was wiped from all the crying and plane ride. The only comforting thing we had was that Jazz would always be watching over us. Jared woke up screaming. It scared the hell out of me. Rose laughed.<br>"He's hungry." She said laughing.

"Thanks for laughing at me." I said laughing. We needed to laugh this was a stressful time. She got up to make a bottle. She came back quickly with a bottle and handed it to me. I fed Jared. The first time feeding him was an amazing experience. I cherished these moments. The look in his eyes were amazing, I started tearing up. They were filled with so much unconditional love. His blue eyes were so brilliant. He was my son. We would head back over to Bella's my parents and Jazz's parents were coming tonight. They were staying at Bella's. She needed the company and the help with Erica. Peter and Charlotte loved their granddaughter dearly. I finished feeding Jared. He looked at me with those eyes and started screaming again. I tried burping him. That wasn't what he wanted. Rose handed me a diaper. I was scared to change him. I took his train pants off and started to undo his diaper and as I did he peed. Rose laughed. I quickly covered him back up with his diaper. I was laughing. This would be memorable. I tried again this time he didn't pee on me and Rose told me to put the new diaper under him before undoing the one he was wearing. She could have told me that before. I changed my first diaper of my son. I was proud of myself. I had never really changed Erica much when we watched her. Rose always did. We got him dressed again and headed over to Bella's.

**Bella POV**

Rose and Em were heading over. Em sounded a little bit better. He said he had something funny to tell me. I looked forward to something upbeat. The funeral was in 2 days. Mom and dad of both Em and Jazz were coming. Peter and Char were about an hour out, and Esme and Carlisle were 2 hours out.

"Bells were here." Em said half smiling as he looked at the picture of Jazz on the mantle.

"What was so funny Em?" I asked. I was hurting pretty badly. I missed Jazz and eventually it wouldn't hurt so bad. I hoped the funeral helped rather than rubbed salt to my wounds.

"Jared peed on me." He said. My mom and I started laughing.

"Let me guess you didn't wait until he was done." I asked.

"Yeah, Rose didn't warn me." He said. I just laughed.

"Boys are much different than girls changing diapers." I said laughing.

"Now you tell me." He said laughing. "What needs done around the house?"

"Not much, I just wanted to do a little house work before they showed up. Dishes are done, just need to make up their rooms and change the sheets." I said. "Otherwise it's good to go."

"Okay, I'll do that." He said with a tear falling. I hugged him.  
>"I know. This is as hard for you as it is me. He was your brother and what you saw, I can't imagine, you are handling it so well." I said.<p>

"Bella, I'm not handling it well. I am putting on a smile. I feel like a part of me has been ripped away. He was my brother. We went through a lot together, school, basic, deployments. I am being as strong as I can on the outside, I am crying on the inside." He said with tears falling.

"I know, I am putting on a strong face for Erica, I am crying on the inside. I feel like a part of me has been ripped away too. He was my second half." I said. He nodded hugging me. Rose looked at me with sad eyes.

"Bella, are you okay?" She asked. I nodded as tears flowed. I was starting to soak Em's shirt.

"Yeah, I will be. This is just hard, It's hard to go in my room. All his stuff is still in there. My heart drops, looking at his pictures, but they make me smile because I have those for Erica when she get older. "I said crying. Rose came over and joined the hug.

"I love you sis." Rose said.

"I love you too." I said. I felt Erica tugging on my leg. She must have woke up.

"Hey sweetie. I said. Em broke the hug and picked her up.

"Hey baby girl. You have a good nap?" He asked. She smiled. "I take that as a yes."

"Story." She said with a smile. Em looked at us with a smile.

"I got to go do something upstairs. Auntie and mommy I'm sure would love to help you. Mommy needs a big hug. Can you give her a hug." He said as a tear fell. I dropped down to her level when he put her down and headed upstairs. She gave me a big hug and kiss.

"I love you too. Let's go read a story of Daddy's." I said with tears falling. I would cherish the stories he made for her and so would she. We sat there for a good 30 minutes as she watched the stories. I smiled as the tears flowed. We heard a knock. They shouldn't be here so soon. Please don't be who I think it is. I answered the door. It was the KV leader. She had cookies in her hands. I smiled and tears started flowing.

"Hey Bella. I'm sorry for your loss. I came to see how you were doing." She said sadly.

"I'll be okay. We all miss him like crazy." I said crying.

"If you need anything let me know." She said. " I brought you some cookies. I know you probably don't want to eat much. I don't blame you. How's Erica doing."

"She's good. She doesn't realize what's going on but she is okay. I have to stay strong for her. "I said.

"Okay, I'm here if you ever want to talk. I'll let you go. I see you have company." She said.

"Thank you. I really appreciate the cookies. I'll be okay." I said crying. Peter and Char pulled up. They looked at me with a sad smile. The KV left and they came over. Peter was first over.

"Baby girl, I'm sorry you are having to go through this." He said.

"It's not your fault. I knew he may never come home. I had a bad feeling that day. I came home to them here. It still feels so surreal like a dream to me. I don't think it'll totally hit completely until the funeral. He gave us letters and they brought closure, but it's so hard saying goodbye." I said in tears.

"I know. It will be hard. We miss him dearly. They were coming home soon. You will always have us. We love you sweetie. How is our grandbaby?" Peter asked.

"She's good. She doesn't realize what's going on. She just looks at his picture and says daddy." I said in tears. He nodded. She came running out.

"Papa, daddy say he luv you." She said.  
>"Tell him I love him too." He said through tears. She smiled and wanted up. Char gave me a hug.<p>

"I love you sweetie. We can stay as long as you need." She said smiling sadly.  
>"Thank you." I said through tears. Em came down stairs around the time we came in. He smiled and said hello. They gave hugs. They were like a second family to him.<p>

"I'm Sorry Em." Char said crying.

"I know. I see the image at all times. They did all they could and I took the ones out who hit him. I don't know whether I can go back this tour. I have another 2 years active. I just hope I don't have to go on another deployment. I don't know how I'd handle it. Jazz has been on everyone. It would be too hard." He said crying. He was finally let out his emotions. He needed too.

"I know. Let's hope you don't have to. I don't want you to have to go through that. "Peter said sadly. It had to be difficult to see the accident in his mind. I couldn't do it. Erica went to Char. She gave kisses to her.

"I don't get any?" Peter said. I laughed. It was much needed. She kissed him on the cheek. Mom came over and said hello. She was starting dinner. I didn't have much of an appetite.

"He left us letters. He knew something was going to happen. It kills me to know that." I said. I grabbed mine and Erica's and handed them to Peter. He was in tears instantly. He was speechless as he sat down on the couch.

"He did know. Did it help with some closure?" He asked. I nodded.

"He left Em and Rose one too." I said. "In a way it did. The funeral I think will either rub salt in the wounds or help with closure. I don't know yet. It's all still surreal. I keep hoping he'll walk through that door." I said in tears. Em pulled me into a hug.

"I wish he would too. I miss my brother." He said as tears flowed. He had his letter in his hand and handed it to Peter. Char came over and I nodded that she could read ours. Erica was playing in the corner with her toys. I swear she was seeing Jazz. She kept saying daddy. It was comforting. Char read the letters.

"Wow, thank you for letting us read those. Even though he didn't leave any for us. We know he loved us. That's all we need to know. We miss him dearly. I about collapsed when you told me he was gone. My baby boy is gone was all I could think. It's all still surreal to me to Bells. I hope the funeral helps both of us with closure. It's going to be hell for a while. I went to his room and cried for hours straight yesterday. I still can't believe it why did he have to be taken. He was a good man, father , and husband." Char said with tears flowing.

"I know. I don't understand either." I said hugging her. The emotions in the house was enough to bring a person down in sorrow and collapse.

"The good die young." Peter said through his tears after he read Em's letter. "We don't always know why. He is needed upstairs. Like he said he will always be watching over us. Esme and Carlisle came over to us. They were playing with Jarod giving us our space. They read the letters.

"Can I hold Jared." Peter asked. Em nodded. Carlisle handed Peter Jared.

"Your uncle was a good man. He will always be watching over you. He loved you very much. He wanted to be here for you in person, but he is in spirit." Peter said bringing us all to more tears. It was true what he said. He did love Jared. It was his godson.

"Why did Jazz have to go. I had to watch. They wheeled him in and I couldn't do anymore. The cavalier was so damaged. It didn't help. The one thing to protect us didn't protect him. Why. We were going home soon. He was going to meet Jarod. He was going to be at his baptism." Em said falling to his knees.

"Em, you did all you could. I know you did son. It's not your fault." Peter said in tears. Rose was behind him holding him. The man that was a big teddy bear was breaking down. It was his breaking point. Rose and I had hit ours long ago. He nodded. Esme and Carlisle finished reading the letters. They were in tears.

"Son don't blame yourself please. It's not your fault. Sadly, it was his time to go. The good die young. That's the sad part." Carlisle said in tears. Mom was in tears coming in.

"I know this is hard. We don't always know why. We do know he will be watching over us. He is with us in spirit. He wouldn't want you to blame yourself. He knows you did everything you can son." Mom said hugging him. Em got up and nodded. We talked another half hour while dinner cooked. It was hard. We told some stories of his childhood. We all sat down and ate. None of us had a huge appetite. We all were grieving. I saw Erica smile and look in the corner. I smiled. I love you Jazz I whispered. I felt a kiss on my forehead. He was with us.

"What's wrong?" Peter asked.

"Nothing. Jazz is here, he'll always be here." I said crying. We finished dinner. We all were emotionally drained. Em and Rose headed home as did mom. Peter put Erica to bed. She insisted on watching daddy read a book. We all did. I smiled through it. Char and Peter didn't know he did videos of reading books.

"Yeah, she watches them constantly." I said smiling through my tears.

"She will treasure these forever." Esme said. I nodded . She was out like a light by the end of it. Peter put her in her crib in her room. We all said goodnight. I heard goodnight. So did they. They smiled.  
>"Goodnight Jazz." I said.<br>"Goodnight son." The parents said through tears. He was making it known he was watching over us. I laid in bed.

"I love you Jazz, Goodnight." I said. I heard an I love you too. I cried myself to sleep. In a few days the funeral would be held. Tomorrow I had to sign some papers. I wasn't looking forward to that. I drifted off to sleep, wishing I could wrap my arms around Jazz. Wishing he could hold Erica one last time. Hold his godson.

**A/N- I hope you enjoyed the chapter. Please leave a review if you have time and have a wonderful weekend. It'll start to get more upbeat and healing start for them. The funeral will be in the next chapter. I really hated writing the author note but I didn't know exactly when I would get it out. **


	7. Chapter 7

Hey guys, sorry it's been so long. I will be working on updates this weekend. I have been swamped with school. Don't lose hope I will be updating soon. Been hectic this past 2 weeks. I apologize.


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N- I deeply apologize for taking so long on an update. I hope you enjoy the chapter. I don't own any of these characters.**

**Chapter 6**

**Bella POV**

I woke up crying. I was dreaming of the day he left for deployment. I heard them downstairs. I smelled the coffee. Erica was playing with her toys. I heard them all talking. In 2 days, his funeral would be held. I burst into tears after the realization. He was truly gone. It was still all surreal. I wonder if it will ever feel real. Hopefully I will get some type of closure through the funeral. I know it will take time to heal from it and learn to cope. It was 8 or so. I dried my eyes and got in the shower. The water felt amazing on my back. Tears started to fall again. I knew it wouldn't be the last today. I was emotional as is. I got dressed slowly. I dreaded today. I had to go over final arrangements. His body was back in the US. We were able to see him today and I had to sign papers today as well. Today would be a hard day. I made my way downstairs. I had a few tears fall as I saw his picture on the mantel. I'd cherish that forever. He will be forever in my heart. I was taken out of my thoughts when Carlisle said good morning.

"Morning." I said in tears. He pulled me into a hug.

"I know sweetie." I said. Erica came over and gave me a hug. I got down to her level, hugged her, and gave her a kiss.

"Good morning princess." I said with a smile. She had his eyes. That was for sure. She went back to playing with her toys. Char had made breakfast. It was cold but I was thankful of her for that. I didn't want to do it. I wasn't all that hungry but it smelled good. I grabbed coffee and had some breakfast. I felt as if I was watching it all in slow motion. I was grieving. It wasn't uncommon. I heard a knock. Char got up to answer it. It was Rose and Emmett. Jared was awake. He was pissed and well I giggled. I remember those days. Em looked at him scared. They looked wiped. He must not have slept well last night. We had many sleepless nights in the first few weeks. Rose took him out of the car seat. He was still screaming. He had a deafening scream. Must have got that from Em. I had finished eating. I washed my plate and went out where they were.

"You guys look like you need sleep." I said smiling. They nodded.  
>"He didn't sleep at all last night." Em said tired. I nodded.<p>

"If it's alright with Bella, we will take him so you guys can get some sleep." Carlisle said smiling. I nodded.

"Thank you." Em said relieved. I laughed. He had no clue what he was in for. I took him from Rose. He was fussy. I was used to it. Erica was a fussy baby too. As soon as I took him he calmed down. Em looked at me in amazement.

"How did you do that?" He asked causing me to laugh.

"It's an auntie thing. He has been this way from day one." I said smiling. "Don't worry. You two go get some sleep. He'll be fine. I have what we need here."

"Thank you." Rose said smiling handing me the diaper bag.

"You're welcome. I know this is difficult but the viewing of his body is today. If you would like to come it's in the afternoon." I said in tears. They nodded on the verge of tears.

"We'll be there." Em said sadly. It was difficult for all of us. We were all so close and to lose him was a big loss for all of us. Rose nodded. I gave her a hug. We both needed one. Erica came over smiling. Em got down to her level.

"How's the princess of the castle doing?" He asked. She was always a princess to him. He spoiled her rotten. She smiled and gave him a hug and kiss. I laughed. She was always so caring and knew when we needed a hug. "Good, I'll see you later."

She smiled and gave Rose a hug and a kiss. They left so they could get some sleep. I remembered those days. Em and Rose took Erica on a few occasions I'd repay them now. Carlisle took him and started rocking him. He fell asleep quickly. Carlisle and him just relaxed in the chair. Erica crawled up in his lap to watch some cartoons. I snapped a picture. It was precious. Char came over.

"She's such a sweetie. We wanted to let you sleep in. She was in her crib and had the biggest smile when we went in there. She ate well too. She loves pancakes." Char said smiling. I nodded laughing. I knew she loved pancakes. They had dressed her too. I was thankful for that. I was happy to get the help.

"She has her daddy's eyes." I said as a tear fell. Char nodded. "She's growing so fast."

"She is, I hat e to ask but what time do you have to do those papers?" She asked with a half-smile.

"An hour or so. They are coming to the house to do it. I don't want to go on base to do it. It would be even harder. I do need to do some shopping today. I'm dreading it." I said sadly.

"Okay. I'll go with you if you would like." She said hesitantly. I nodded. The hour passed by quickly and the papers were signed. The hardest part was the life insurance portion. I broke down. We got all the papers signed. It was time to head to the store. Erica was down for her nap and Jared was entertaining the men. We left and they said they could handle it. We women went to the commissary. I did my shopping. I had to make it all seem normal. I saw a few of the wives of the men in his unit. Only one came up and gave her condolences. I was thankful for that. The others just gave me sympathetic smiles. I smiled back as much as I could. It didn't reach my eyes and I know they saw that. I was done quickly and the house would be stocked now.

"Bella, are you okay?" Char asked. I nodded. I must have been quiet for a while.

"Yeah, I have to make things as normal as possible or I start thinking about it, the way it happened, what Em described and I have to be strong for Erica. I can't just shut the world off. I want to but I can't." I said sadly with a few tears falling.

"I know I want to too. I know it won't do any good." She said crying. I pulled over. Esme drove home. I couldn't drive anymore. I knew what was coming next. We made it home and put it all away. It was time to go to the viewing. Em and Rose were at the house. They looked 100% better. I smiled as Em took Jared and tickled him. He did the same with Erica. I dreaded as the minutes passed and the time came. I knew this would mean he was truly gone and I didn't want to have to realize that. I wanted him home. I broke down. They smiled with tears in their eyes.  
>"Let's go." I said sadly through my tears. "This means he's truly gone."<p>

Em nodded and he was balling. "I know. I don't want it to be true either. I lost my best friend, brother. I lost a piece of me."

"We all don't want it to be true. Bella and Erica lost a husband and Erica's father. Erica will not have her daddy around and will grow up without him. We lost a son. Our only son. Esme and Carlisle were another set of parents to him. Em you lost your brother and Rose you lost your brother as well. We all lost something with him. We will always hold him close to our hearts. He will always be with us." Char said sadly in tears. We all were in tears. We headed out. Base cleared us and we went into the base for the second time today. We pulled up to the funeral home that was on base. It wasn't used very often but they had it for these cases. We slowly got out of our cars. I had tears rolling down my cheeks. I held Erica. I wasn't going to let Erica see it was an open casket viewing. We made our way in and a man welcomed us and gave us his condolence. I was tired of hearing it. I was angry that he was taken and no amount of apologies could bring him back. I just nodded and thanked him. He led us to the viewing room. He was in a beautiful casket. The lid was open. It all truly hit me. He was gone. I about collapsed. Peter saw it and I handed him Erica. I regained my composure and to be honest I didn't care if I did at that point but I knew for Erica I needed to. I walked up to the casket. Everyone stood back. Tear after tear fell with each step to the casket. Memories of our times together were flashing through my mind. Our wedding day, our first date, the birth of Erica and how happy he was. I couldn't hold it in any longer I cried and kneeled down and as I peered into the casket he looked so peaceful. He looked like he was sleeping. It made me hurt even more. I knew he would never wake up. He was in his dress blues. They must have had another pair made for his funeral. It was the least they could do.

"Why Jazz, Why." I cried. "We need you back. Come back please."

"Jazzy, please, this can't be true come back to us." I cried. I felt hands on my shoulders. It was Peter. He pulled me to him.  
>"Why, Why did it have to be him. He was a loving and caring person. The world was brighter with him in it. Why did he have to go. Why does anyone have to be killed by this war?" I said sadly.<p>

"I know." Is all Peter said. Em looked at me with tears flowing down his face. He was in as much pain as I was. I walked back to the bench and sat down with my face in my hands. I couldn't be strong right now.

Peter walked up "Son, we all miss you dearly. May you rest in peace. We know you will always be watching over us." He said as a few tears fell. "Goodbye son. See in heaven when we meet again."

Char walked up slowly. She was dreading this as much as I was. "Son, as your father said we miss you dearly. It is hard to believe you are gone. It just didn't seem real until now. I know you are truly gone. I will see you again in the future. I love you son. Goodbye for now."

Em walked up. He was broken. He was at his point of not being able to hold it in. "Jazz you were always a brother to me. You always will be. I will take care of your family as well as mine. We all miss you. Bella is staying as strong as she can. Erica is missing you as well. She loves your videos. I wish you got to meet Jared. He's amazing. He hates sleep but I love him to death. Rest in Peace brother. Goodbye for now. See you when my time is up." Em said causing Rose to break down. She didn't want to say goodbye at all. She slowly made her way up.

"Jazz why. You are my brother. We miss you and you would have loved your Godson. He is amazing. I love you brother. Goodbye for now. I hope to see you in heaven." She said through her tears. We all were emotionally drained. Carlisle and Esme walked up together. Esme couldn't speak at all. She was too emotional and it was too hard.  
>"Son, you always were family in our eyes. We all miss you and hope you rest in peace. I know you are watching down on us. We'll take care of your family as well. We both love you and miss you. We can't say that enough. See you when we get to heaven son. Goodbye." Carlisle said sadly. Faintly you could hear Esme say goodbye. I had to say goodbye. I needed the closure. I wasn't ready to say goodbye but I had to. This was the last time I'd truly get to see him. I kissed his forehead. He was so cold.<br>"Jazz, I love you. You will always be in my heart. A day won't go by without thinking of you. I have a beautiful daughter and will always have piece of you with me. Goodbye. I love you." I said breaking down and falling to my knees. It was true. He was gone. I just laid there. Erica came to me and gave me a hug. I just held her. No one came over. They knew I needed my space. Erica had a tear in her eye and was waving to the casket. I wasn't going to show her. She knew we were saying goodbye to somebody. She didn't fully understand. She'd know who her daddy was. We gave one last look, said a silent goodbye, and headed home. It was emotionally draining. It was hard and it was final he was gone. He wouldn't walk through the door again. He wouldn't kiss me again. It finally hit. Tomorrow was the funeral.

**A/N- Sorry this one was a tear jerker at the end. Next chapter is the funeral and well it will probably be worse. I hope it was worth the wait. Please leave a review if you have the chance. I love your feedback.**


	9. Chapter 9

Hey sorry for the long wait, I will be getting a new computer this weekend, my motherboard went out on my other one and it was getting fixed and somehow they screwed it up even more so they are replacing the computer all together. Sorry I haven't updated for a while. Been busy, we are cleaning up our new house to move into soon so at night we have been over there along with school and not having my computer I haven't had much time. Please forgive me. I will be posting soon, Next week I will try to update as much as possible to make up for not updating. Sorry for the bad news.


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N- I deeply apologize for not updating a lot sooner. I think this may be the last chapter. I may do at most 2 more. I hope you enjoy the chapter. It is a tear jerker. Sorry guys. It is the funeral. I don't own these characters, blah, blah, blah. The usual. Please leave a review if you have a chance. Sorry for any mistakes and errors. It's about midnight so I am a little tired but I know how you all love to see an update in your inbox in the morning to start off your day. I do. Have a wonderful week and have a safe weekend. **

**Laura**

**Previously in Time spent apart**

"Jazz, I love you. You will always be in my heart. A day won't go by without thinking of you. I have a beautiful daughter and will always have piece of you with me. Goodbye. I love you." I said breaking down and falling to my knees. It was true. He was gone. I just laid there. Erica came to me and gave me a hug. I just held her. No one came over. They knew I needed my space. Erica had a tear in her eye and was waving to the casket. I wasn't going to show her. She knew we were saying goodbye to somebody. She didn't fully understand. She'd know who her daddy was. We gave one last look, said a silent goodbye, and headed home. It was emotionally draining. It was hard and it was final he was gone. He wouldn't walk through the door again. He wouldn't kiss me again. It finally hit. Tomorrow was the funeral.

**Chapter 7**

**Bella POV**

It was the day of the funeral. Each minute felt like hours as the time passed by. I was dreading it even more than I had the day of the viewing. I was dressed in black mourning my husband knowing they would hand me that flag and say sorry for our loss. I was dreading that the most. I was angry and was tired of people telling me sorry. Sadly the time came and I had found out earlier that the squad was back early for Jazz and the squad to take their place wanted to go early and with the loss in the squad it all hit them hard so their request was granted. They would be the one on the fire squad and a few carrying the caskets. Em, Carlisle and Peter would be pall bearers as well. We headed out with tears in our eyes. We didn't talk only sobs came out every so often. We made it to the chapel. It was beautifully set up. Flowers and decorated the way he would have liked. It wasn't over the top. It all started before I was ready. I was a complete wreck. Erica kept pointing the picture they had up of Jazz. The minister started with a prayer and did the soldiers prayer as well. The men from his squad and their wives were there. They were lucky to have their husbands home. I was one of the unlucky few who lost their husband to the war. They smiled at me sympathetically. I smiled back with tear after tear falling as each told a memory about him. The one that touched me the most was when Em got up there. You could tell he had been crying as a few tears escaped. He told the story of how he decided to marry Rose the day we got married and the reason why was because he finally realized after all the talk him and Jazz had about marriage he was right. When the one comes along you can't let them go. I laughed because I had known how he felt and I remember them talking about it. He announced it to Jazz as I walked up. He was the best man in the wedding as Rose was my Maid of Honor. Peter's speech hit me hard. It was remembering his moments when he was child and how Erica reminded her of him including his strong will and caring nature. He was a very caring person and would do anything for his family or friends. Esme went up and talked about some of their high school antics that Em didn't think she knew about. The look on his face was priceless. I let out a chuckle. The story was about them sneaking out to go on a date with a few girls in high school. His truck gave him away. They just laughed about it and left it at that. He didn't know they knew about that.

"We parents know more than you may think." Esme said making everyone laugh a little. "Bells, by the way Em would be happy to be at the door for Erica's first date with a shotgun telling him to keep his hands off her for Jazz."

I laughed with happy tears in my eyes. I was still sad but I needed to remember the good times with him because I couldn't lock myself away. Erica needed me. I nodded at Esme's comment. Em elbowed me and nodded saying gladly. Erica was giggling. His squad members got up to tell stories about their deployment about how he was worried about everyone else more than himself. They would give their lives for his as he would have given his life to save them. It made me sad to think about how the other wives may have felt about that because all of our worst fears was having the 2 officers showing up at our door giving us their condolence of a loss of our spouse or child. One fear we all had in common being a spouse to a member of the service in any branch.

It was time to head to the gravesite service. This was what I had been dreading. Just watching them lower him in the ground would be the most difficult scene to me. They had the car out front to transport him the cemetery for lost soldiers. I chose to have him buried there rather than at the local cemetery. Peter, Carlisle and Em got up with tear in their eyes as they helped the other 3 squad members Embry, Edward, and James carry out the casket. They were the closest to him. Em picked who would help. I couldn't. He was loaded into the car and we headed to the cemetery. The procession was long and as we drove by the people who saw it bowed their head and smiled a sign of condolence but also a prayer to the family of the lost soldier. I had done it when I had seen unfortunate families that lost a loved one. We made it to the cemetery. He was going to be buried right under the oak tree. The men again carried the casket to the burial plot and light placing it on the brace. The minister allowed the others to come over and had chairs set up for the family. I had them add Rose and Em along with their parents to the seats. They were family too. As the minister started to speak it all became a blur. We bowed our heads to pray and he said a prayer.

This combat soldier's prayer,

Who has served his time in Hell,

Is may we learn the lessons of war well,

That we not doom future generations,

The same old tales of horror to tell,

To endure what in youth they see mistakenly as glory.

Oh God, do not let our children

Repeat the same old story.

Make it so that America's babies live to grow old

In this land of the free and the bold.

Help us throw off the shackles of hate that bind

And grow old in a life of a peaceful kind.

Teach us that there is no glory in war,

Nor honor there that brave men should not abhor.

Teach us instead, one for another our brothers to love.

Shower us with thine Celestial message from above,

That we plant seeds of peace evermore

And make war-no-more!

But if I should die on some far, far away battlefield

Know I answered the call

For a grand principle of freedom to yield.

My fervent prayer is that death

May not have been in vain

Fighting for peace and right for the world to attain.

My brothers, American roses standing by my side

On alien soil dying

In the summer of my youthful pride

All the leaves around me falling,

Now I'm lying here still, in sunshine and in shadow,

Longing to hear, "brother next door, I love you so."

For moldering in the soft ground below,

I feel you living and loving in the world above me

Standing tall because I fought that you might be...

Oh look ye down now,

And tell me you still think of me

Honor my red blood, spilt that others might stand free.

Tell me that I did not give my all for you in vain

That brothers and sisters do not look upon my sacrifice

With hateful,

Or even worse,

Uncaring disdain.

Do not forget me when my valley's hushed

And white with snow,

Grass growing green in the summer of my meadow

Help me see the peace I lived and died for grow.

Make my lonely grave richer,

Sweeter be...

Make this truly,

"The land of the free

And the home of the brave,"

I gave my life to save

That I might too, lie eternally,

Forever free...

(Gary Jacobson Combat prayer)

As the prayer was finished each of the member of the squad was mouthing it. It was what Jazz would have wanted.

They knew it by heart.  
>"Aim. Fire." The sergeant spoke. I jumped with each shot and another tear fell. This was the final chapter to Jazz's life. He was truly gone. As the last shot fired more tears fell knowing he would be laid to rest. Resting in peace watching over us and making sure we are safe.<p>

They folded the flag as the national anthem played bringing tears to all at the service. It was beautiful and the sun shone through the trees. I smiled and said goodbye to Jazz as they handed me the flag giving their condolence. The service ended with a closing prayer and slowly each family left a rose on his casket with the squad members coming up and giving condolence as well. I could see it pained them as well. It was especially hard for Em when they did. He was showing his vulnerable side. His squad leader came over and smiled telling me he was a good man and a great soldier. They slowly left leaving only us. I walked up to the casket with tears falling to the ground with each step knowing this was the last time I'd get to see him.

"Baby, I love you. I know you are watching but help me be strong for Erica. I need it. I miss you so much. I don't want to say goodbye but I know I have to. I will see you in heaven and know you will be by my side with everything I do. I love very much. Erica misses you and will always be reminded what a wonderful man you were and how much you loved her." I said through tears falling with each word. Peter and Char each had a shoulder on my hand. Erica came up and smiled saying bye daddy. That only made it worse. We all said our goodbyes. Em was having the hardest time with it. I put my hand on his shoulder and gave him a hug. He was my brother that would be there for myself and Erica if needed. Rose said a tearful goodbye. Peter and Char said goodbye sadly. Losing their only son was hard enough, losing him to a war was even harder. We all knew the possibilities but we never thought it would be us. We lost a brother, son, husband, godfather, father and most of all a best friend. We could never get him back only press forward and make the most out of life and look at the good times he was with us. The good die young and they all have a reason, but we always have to remember that they will be watching down on us and have beautiful wings.

**A/N- What do you think? I'm not sure whether to continue it or just leave it at that. I hope you enjoyed the chapter. Please review if you have a chance. I'd love to hear your opinion. Have a wonderful week and safe weekend. Thank you all for being patient with me with this story.**

**Laura**


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